I'm afraid... :'(

T_T i can't stop for not crying. i can't deny myself to act like i'm strong. and i can't stand all this pain together....

How could it happen to me?

I'm trying to persuade myself for not being too negative to face all this things.....

But...for sure....i'm really afraid to know the truth. I still want to live my life as along as others. Please.... I can't face it when i know everything is not alright later.....

So sad,,,,

What you feel if u know that u just can live for a month only???

What you do if u know your age are not long as others?

Really afraid about DEATH right now....

6Oct2010...i know something wrong inside my breast. but i hope it will be not there tomorrow.

Unluckily....it really there. somewhere in my right breast. OMG.

4 the 1st...i don't want anyone to know about it...but..i know i can't hide this thing and i really need a support.

8Oct...I was go to the clinic for check up. Oh no babe. 

The Doctor is a man. What can i do...I just let it be..for being touch my breast. fuuhhh~

and the Doctor was confirmed that lump on my right breast.

Then, i need to do ultra sound for detect whether it cancer or not.

But i decided to do it after my final exam.

i hope i can't stand with it.

I try to be strong. i try to be positive. i try to not think about too much. i try to believe that everything will okay.

everything will okay....i know...

huh~


Dear LORD....in your HAND....i give all my heart & soul.....please do take care of me. and bless me for all time.because i know you never leave me alone. amen...........